Wednesday, May 21, 2014

Movie Review: Amazing Spideman 2: Sad to Say: Avoid

I just have to say one thing. This movie was too damn loooong!!!! It felt like it took an eternity to finally finish and I could not wait to get out of the theater. It just seemed like the editor was fired early in the production or the director was some tyrant that wanted to get every last shot of Garfield talking to Sally Field in the movie. I think a good 40 minutes to an hour of running time could have been cut out of the film. That would have made it a peppy action packed comic book movie. Instead it was a plodding dinosaur with chase scene after chase scene and some very good actors stinking up the joint.

Well I will also say that the Andrew Garfield as Spider-man experiment is over in my mind. I enjoyed him despite everything in the first Amazing Spider-man. He was good-natured and earnest and had great chemistry with Emma Stone. However, he has morphed into an asshole that talks trash and I really don't want to watch him any further as Spider-man. Toby Maguire was just a head-and-shoulders better Peter Parker IMO and this movie solidified it. I wanted to see Maguire win the day in the old Spider-man movies now when it comes to Garfield I could really care less about.

Emma Stone does a great job as always but looks very thin and blond and Hollywood in this film and I did not like it. She has great chemistry with Garfield and this was one of the saving graces of the movie. When they were together on the screen it was actually fun to watch. The scene where she yells out "Peter" and covers her mouth when he webs her to the car was priceless.

I did not like the new Green Goblin at all and the actor that played him Dane DeHaan was frankly quite awful in the role. The old Green Goblin, James Franco, was just much better at showing the betrayal and earlier friendship than DeHaan could. This character amounted to a spoiled rich boy that needed Spider-mans blood and wanted to get Garfield to help him. He played a flat and featureless character that had a goofy haircut. When he finally became the Green Goblin he looked pretty stupid. His face was all messed up and he had that generic green metal armored uniform you have seen in a 100 movies before. They could have totally cut him out of the movie and I would have been fine with it.

It is sad to say that Jamie Foxx was also terrible as Electro. They tried to do a Venom thing where this nerdy guy loved Spider-man and then felt betrayed and became a villain that wanted to kill him for some reason. It was just ham-handed and sad. The CGI on Electro made Foxx look like he was made out of fluffy towel material and not menacing at all. His powers looked dated with him shooting lightning bolts around while wearing a hoodie. It just amounted to a great actor looking like a white-eyed Smurf trying his best to chew the scenery.

Also Paul Giamatti was utterly wasted as the Rhino. He played the standard Russian mobster character that they could have just taken from central casting. He was introduced with a fun chase scene that unfortunately dragged on and on. However, they immediately drop the ball and have him growl out "I keeel you Spider-man," a bunch of times. It was just a huge waste of a great actor and I hope he does not come back for the next one. I just want to see him in a better movie.

Finally, like I said before the movie just meandered for what seemed like forever. Garfield breaks up with Emma Stone because he keeps seeing her father giving a disapproving look. Then we have a bunch of car chases and see the origin story of the Green Goblin and Electro in excruciating detail. In fact I kind of glossed over what happened because it was such a slog. Suffice it to say if you like long car chases, Spider-man soaring through the city over and over, and like 10 set-piece battles between an asshole in a skin-tight suit fighting a Smurf with white eyes this movie is for you.

In fact I am going to pass on the Sinister 6 in the next movie even though they are one of my favorite super-villain groups. I just can't take another 2.5 hour car chase and have to see 6 different (probably really good) actors do a terrible job fighting against an asshole in a skin-tight suit. We will probably see Liam Neeson as Kraven the Hunter, Harvey Keitel as Dr. Octopus, Daniel Day-Lewis as the Vulture, Denzel Washington as Mysterio, Tom Hanks as Sandman, and Jamie Foxx reprising his role of Electro and they will still stink up the joint. In any case I guess I won't be seeing it anyway. Spider-man has just joined the Punisher, the Fantastic 4 and Ghost Rider on my comic book movie avoid list. 

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